Author Archives: Maggie

Rockets and Planes – June 13, 2014

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Cru RocketRockets and Planes – both fly and get you to your destination. One just has more resources and a longer destination.

Let’s talk about rockets first. There is a new video on YouTube that is the best explanation of Campus Crusade for Christ/Cru that we have ever seen! Take a few minutes and check it out at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y23_GChHn30

Now let’s talk about planes — Roger is headed for South Africa for a trip with CrossRoads June 12-19. Crossroads is a resource ministry that trains public school teachers how to deal with youth at risk, equipping them to teach morals and ethics from a Biblical world view. While he is there, Roger will meet with CrossRoads leadership from 10 countries: Ethiopia, Uganda, Zambia, Zimbabwe, Seychelles, Mauritius, Swaziland, Botswana, Mozambique and South Africa, as well as the national director of South Africa. Roger and the team will be gleaning best practices, training in new processes and materials and begin the process of planning by country and by region for the next five years.

This is his first overseas trip since Maggie began treatments again for cancer. Pray that the trip will reap eternal benefits and that Maggie will do well at home (She has friends and family she can call on if needed).

You go with us wherever we go through your prayers and giving. You have helped “launch” ministries around the world, in person and digitally. Whenever, wherever, we go, we’re so glad you are with us!

Roger and Maggie Bruehl

Results of Faithfulness – May, 2014

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You did not choose me, but I chose you
and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit
and that your fruit should abide,
so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you.
These things I command you, so that you will love one another.
John 15:16-17

Our small group from church has been going through the book of John, and it’s been a wonderful study, especially powerful in light of Easter and Jesus’ resurrection. Each week God has unfolded fresh insights. These verses became even more powerful in light of an email we received:Linda Johnson

The Lord laid you on my heart tonight and I want to thank you for your spiritual input and nurturing my Christian faith. I remember so well the night Maggie shared the Four Spiritual Laws with me as a follow up to CCC’s concert and Jon Braun’s (I think that was his name and not sure how to spell it, but it was on Sex, Love, and Dating). Although I didn’t quite understand the difference between religion and a personal relationship with Jesus, I became involved in the CCC meetings.

About three months later that the Holy Spirit touched my heart and gave me understanding that I truly accepted Christ as my Savior.  I loved our bible studies and friendship.  I learned so much and the Lord used CCC and you to instill in me a love for evangelism and discipleship.  I am grateful for the firm foundation that was built in my early years as a Christian…

Linda was a student at Illinois State University in 1969, and her life was radically changed. After teaching 6 years to pay off student loans, she attended Moody Bible Institute. The communist revolution in Grenada, West Indies, forced her home after just 2 years as a missionary. Resilient, she has served in Brazil for the last 30 years. Like she said, “Little did I know what plans the Lord had for me and my future then…Thank you for being instruments in the Lord’s hands to teach me guide me, and challenge me in my walk with the Lord.”

We were humbled to receive the email and be reminded, after all these years, of God’s faithfulness. Linda is an amazing example of “fruit that remains.” And we were reminded it was not by our power we were chosen to reach others. We were fulfilling our “appointment.” We asked for “fruit” and God has given it to us over and beyond anything we could have imagined.

We were grateful to hear Linda’s story and hope you hear it as a story affirming you in your faithfulness. So many have stood with us during the last 40 years of ministry. Often, we don’t know the results. But sometimes we get glimpses of how those prayers and giving have produced fruit. Thank you for your partnership with us.

Roger and Maggie

Conversations About Jesus – April 8, 2014

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I’ve been sick all week and am finally opening the mail. We received 2 letters back to back that I thought might be an encouragement to you.

The first was from Pam who talked about Debbie (Jesus Film) who had an opportunity to share with a Muslim woman on the plane. I don’t know about you, but I often don’t know where to start a conversation. Her opening line was, “Is your religion important to you?” What a great question! The woman explained that she was a devout Muslim, but then asked Debbie about her religious beliefs.

And interesting conversation followed about who Jesus is. Debbie told her about The Jesus Film and Magdalena, a movie we originally created for Muslim women. When they touched down, she was able to find it in Arabic at app.jesusfilmmedia.org and showed it to the woman who exclaimed, “They speak Arabic!” She emailed the link to her so that she could watch the entire film later.

The second was from Leah who had a great Costco story. Three years ago she struck up a conversation with am employee who looked like she was in emotional pain at the gas pumps, bringing God/praying into the conversation. The woman poured out that her estranged daughter was married to an ex-convict who was beating her regularly. She promised to pray, returned the nozzle and drove away.

Just weeks ago, Leah was again at Costco, in the pharmacy line, when Donna rushed up to her. “She left him! She and the girls are now with me!” she said excitedly. They talked in the clothing aisle and Leah told her how she had continued to pray. What a God moment that must have been.

I guess I’m sharing these stories because they are a reminder to me that we are a “light” to those we are around, whether it’s on a plane or in Costco (or a hospital waiting room – where I spend much of my time these days). And I was impressed with the ease and boldness of how these women turned everyday encounters to the Lord. I thought they might be an encouragement to you.

And, this is why we do what we do — a passion to reach people for Christ. How we work out that passion is sometimes more administrative (like auditing the ministry that produces The Jesus Film so that it doesn’t get shut down), but that passion is the same. We knew you were passionate about the gospel also. Maybe these tips will encourage you —

Maggie

 

When “Stable” Is Exciting

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walkIn the past, “stable” has been a boring word to me. I’m such an action person. In fact, according to the Strength Finder’s assessment, two of my top strengths are “Activator” and “Achiever.” Can you see why “stable” feels like no progress at all? Stable is almost a bad as “maintenance.”

But when it comes to my kind of cancer, “stable” is a close runner-up to “remission.” “Cure” is a word I know I will never hear unless there is an incredible medical breakthrough. And I know there are plenty of negative words I have and could hear. So when the doctor said “stable” last week, it was a good thing.

I’m on my 9th round of chemo since last fall. Initially we knocked the cancer back, killing it faster than it was growing. But that’s tough on the body. Now I’m’m at a lower dose of chemo which basically holds it even — we’re killing it at the same rate it is growing. It still compromises my immune system so I have to be careful, but I can still get around.

So “stable” is a good thing. It means I can go on vacation with my family. It means I can make plans with the awareness that they might have to be changed. It means that I get to have lunch with friends and volunteer for projects within the ministry. It means what I dread is coming, but is still a ways away.

I know others who are not in exciting periods in their lives. Their marriage isn’t exciting right now, but stable. Their job isn’t highly motivational, but stable. When do we accept stablity as a good thing and hope (and trust) for things to get better over time? When is faithfulness in less than exciting circumstances what God wants? I’m glad my doctor has a good handle on when to just wait and enjoy life and when to take aggressive action, even it means pain. I pray the same in the lives of others that they will know.

So I’m excited about being “stable.” Right now, i’m rocking on the porch of a cabin in the mountains, listening to gentle drops of rain on tree leaves nearby. That’s something I wouldn’t be doing if I wasn’t stable. Roger and I had devotions together this morning. That’s something I wouldn’t be doing if I wasn’t stable. Kids and grandkids are coming to see us the next few days for fun and frolic, something I wouldn’t be doing if I wasn’t stable. I’m excited to be alive and have opportunity to share “life” with others.

Stable is exciting!

 

Don’t Waste Your Cancer – Taking the Cup

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IMG_1098(Part 3 in a 11 part series based on John Piper’s booklet, “Don’t Waste You Cancer)

 #3 – We waste our cancer if we believe it is a curse and not a gift.

I have seen so many people suffer unnecessarily. It’s not their disease that is causing the suffering, but their judgment of themselves. They are looking for a cause within themselves that will explain why they were chosen — did they eat the wrong foods? Where they exposed to the wrong environment? Did they make wrong choices? Was it inherited?

It’s as if we have to have something to blame, including ourselves. If we can find the cause, then we think it will make sense to us. What we don’t realize is the damage we do to ourselves in the process. I think of Psalms 3:6 where David talks about the thousands who are accusing him — to me it’s the thousands of voices in my own head that accuse me.

And so what? What if we smoked or the office had asbestos? What difference does it make if our uncle had cancer? It doesn’t take away ours. We can’t un-write what has already been written.

Cancer, death, being mortal, is a curse from the beginning of time. It was not God’s ideal. It ended up being what separated us from God.

But it is also what brings us to God. Going through the suffering, we need hope. It’s not just the hope for a cure, but also a hope for a future. It brings us in touch with our mortality, the inevitable.

It challenges us to think differently about this life on earth and what is to come. Our soul is our connection with God and separates us from the plants and animals.

That awareness, and even the fear that comes with it, is a gift. When you look death in the face, you also see life. Each day is precious. It’s savored. Before cancer, I was not as aware that each day contains opportunities to write memories and leave legacies. It’s not about us as much as it is about those who remain.

For me, it has been a gift. Like I said before, it’s a gift in horrible wrapping paper. It’s been a gift I never wanted to receive. At one point, I wrote a poem about it, as if it was a cup of wine:

Taking the Cup

 It was forced on me,
Shoved into my chest
Taking away breath,
Red splashed on white.

I didn’t want it.

I didn’t ask for it
But I could not flee.
It was all over me!

It was freezing cold fear
Gripping mortality,
Ripping apart
Emotions held dear.

I was empty and alone,
Feeling there was nothing
Large enough or wise enough
To lead to hope

Until

I took the cup

Clutched it to my breast
Received it.

Receiving it as a gift, without having to know all the whys, gives a sense of release. God does forgive the past and, in his grace, he offers a future.

I’d love to hear from you if you would like to comment at the top right of this blog…

(Poem taken from Splash: Captured Moments in Time, WestBow Press, available at http://www.Amazon.com And a “shout out” to Blue Ridge Writers and Poets who critiqued this before posting!)

Reading Articles or Working Out?

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DSC_0378Cancer has done a number on my weight. Between the broken leg, chemo and steroids, sitting on the couch and a few higher carb indulgences, I’ve seen a steady increase in my weight. I’ve gotten the weight gain under control, but haven’t been successful with weight loss.

That’s why I read articles with the hope they will encourage me. Jonna Weppler wrote in Woman’s Day, “How I Finally Learned to Stop Dieting.” These are the major points she learned at the Biggest Loser Resort Niagara.

1 – Wake Up, Drink Up – a trainer suggested she drink a big glassful of water before doing anything else in the morning. Actually, I do this one! I saw a TV beauty spot that drinking water hydrates your skin, especially important in the morning. So, before I am really awake and know what I am doing, I drink 24 oz of water! Check off one for me!

2 – Get Serious about Exercise – don’t procrastinate until “everything at home is squared away.” How did they know about me? I’m actually writing this with my gym clothes on, with good intentions to go earlier but getting some things “squared away.” Guilty as charged!

3 – Crunch the numbers – healthy eating is 30/30/40 split (protein, fat and carbs). Again, guilty. When I have done well, it’s because of an app called “My Fitness Pal.” It has made recording much easier and has fast food nutritional counts.

4 – Hit the Hay Sooner – “The later I putter, the likelier I am to end up in the pantry.” This was true before I struggled with fatigue, but now it takes energy to get off the couch to get to the pantry! The principle is to get good, deep rest which is also recommended fighting cancer. I’ve had to process the difference between laziness and rest and give myself permission to take a nap, go to bed earlier or take a natural sleep aid.

5 – Train for less $$$ – find training buddies and split the cost of a trainer. Roger and James have been doing this lately and it has really been effective! As for me and cancer, I’m just glad I get there and know I could do some serious damage if I over do it. Just moving is victory!

6 – Short-Circuit a Sugar Rush – a little sugar reminds a sweet tooth how much you like it (just like a little sin leads to a bigger one?) They suggested a protein/carb combo (turkey on wholewheat). Really??? In my head I know it’ll work, but emotionally…?

7 – Look Past the Scale – encourage yourself when your clothes get looser or can do more reps. I’m pretty good at this, although it’s hard when the scale says the opposite of what I feel! Which is true?

8 – Wear a Tracker – Roger, Becky and Amanda all have trackers and love them. I’m afraid of what it would say and have chosen to turn my head. It’s a tricky thing trying to balance rest and exercise; faithfulness and guilt.

9 – Resist “Magic Monday” Syndrome – Any day is a good day to get back on track. I’d take it one step further, any moment is a good time to get back on track, starting now!

So – I’m off to the gym. I do light cardio as well as strength (muscles support bones so that they as not as stressed) and stretches (I’ve never really recovered from some of the surgeries).  Pray I’m faithful!

Do you struggle with your weight or something else? What works for you? I’d love to hear your comments!

Don’t Waste Your Cancer – A Horribly Wrapped Package

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IMG_1098(Part 2 in a 11 part series based on John Piper’s booklet, “Don’t Waste You Cancer)

 #2 – We waste our cancer if we do not believe it is designed for us by God.

I struggle with this second point from his book. I do believe God allowed cancer in my life. Somehow, in the mass of humanity, I was chosen against the odds for Multiple Myeloma (African-American men get it the most, then Caucasian men, African-American women and lastly Caucasian women).

It is hard for me to think of the God I love handing me cancer. I can’t imagine giving such a horrible gift to one of my children.

But if I take a step back and try in my feeble mind to look at it from the eyes of a loving God, maybe I can begin to gasp it.

We all die. It is the result of sin, a fallen world. But how does a loving God determine the way we die. Some go quickly while others suffer. Some have medical intervention while others have none. Some people live with daily diseases, trying to regulate their lives for just a few extra days.

How does he decide how we die? Are the kinds of death like playing cards he randomly deals out? That doesn’t fit my view of God. I think he must know who can handle what and the impact it will have on those around them. I think, in his love, he does suddenly call some home. And I think in his love, he does ask some to suffer.

Can suffering and love coexist? I know in my case, my suffering causes me to turn to God. My suffering is physical and emotional, but it is also spiritual. It’s not enough to hope that my doctor is wise or that the medicine will work. To get through suffering, I need more.

“What God permits, he permits for a reason,” John Piper says. As I chew on that statement, I have to agree. He permitted cancer into my life. There is a reason I was chosen versus someone else. I may never know the reason, but cancer does make me more dependent on Him.

And I know it has an effect on the lives of others who are seeing me go through it. God is doing something in their lives also. I often say, “God didn’t just bring cancer into my life. He brought it into my husband’s life, my children’s lives, the lives of my grandchildren and friends.” Accepting it personally is, in part, to help others accept it and to allow God to work through in their lives. In the same way God and cancer makes me dependent on God, I want to encourage them.

So I guess, reluctantly, I have to agree: God designed this cancer for me. He didn’t just allow it. It’s a precious gift in a horribly wrapped package. As I tear the paper, I can’t wait to get rid of it. The future is what is inside.

What is your perspective? Do you think God chooses us personally? I’m interested in what you think so please comment.

Don’t Waste Your Cancer – Look it in the Face

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IMG_1098I was recently given a little booklet entitled “Don’t Waste Your Cancer” by John Piper. Although my style and perspective is different, it gave me some good thoughts to chew on so I thought I would look at each one with you and we can chew together.

#1 – We waste our cancer if we don’t hear in our own groaning the hope-filled labor pains of a fallen world.

He goes on to say, “Labor pains mean that something wonderful is coming. We will waste our cancer if we don’t hear in our own groan ins the labor pains of the new creation.” (2 Corinthians 4:17)

Anyone who knows me knows that I have embraced my cancer. It is a part of my life. I talk about it almost as much as I talk about my children. It is part of life…my life.

I talk about it because death is coming, for me as well as all of us. It was not the original plan of creation. God created man “in our image,” the image of an eternal God. But sin, rebellion from dependency on God, changed our character forever. We long for oneness with God and do our best to find it in nature and relationships here on earth. We suffer the pains of a fallen world.

And those who know me know I am not afraid of death. I do believe something wonderful is coming. I know some people have written detailed versions of heaven, and some even claim to have been there. I think I would rather be surprised. What I do know is that God is there without the “falleness” we have known here on earth. I can’t wait to see what that looks like!

And when I talk to others who are not followers of Jesus, they talk of death as sleep or nothingness. Nothing isn’t bad if you are not even aware of it. But it’s a little hard to find “hope” in it. I think I’ll stick to my faith.

I think Dr. Piper is making the point that we waste our cancer if we don’t look it in the face and call it what it is. It’s part of this fallen world. It’s part of life as much as death and suffering are a part of life. We try to avoid, but it’s always there in the end. And if we don’t grasp it and take it to ourself, what God wants to do in our life is wasted.

What are your thoughts? Do you know someone with cancer? Comment and I’ll pray for them. You might want to send them a link to this site if you think it would be helpful. 

Round 8 – New Normal

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IMG_1050I haven’t posted since the end of February – what happened to March and April? I’m just about ready to begin round 8 of chemo…and this is beginning to look as if this is my life…for now.

Rounds 4 and 5 were hard as my immune system crashed both times. I never had to be hospitalized, for which I am grateful. Since earlier rounds had done their job in knocking the cancer back, the doctor reduced the dosage to 10 mmg (from 25) to see if we could just hold it low without crashing my blood counts. And so far it has worked.

An added benefit is that I feel better without as much chemo in my system. The shakes are not as severe, my energy is better and I’m driving again! We were able to travel to Illinois and spend time with Roger’s family and supporting churches. We helped Jessica move houses (still in Ft. Lauderdale area). I did a “Relay for Life” with family (picture) and am volunteering again at Cru. Life seems to be getting back to a “new normal.”

I know it’s just a season but it feels good. If things remain the same, there won’t be as many urgent posts. In fact, I’ve thought about starting a new blog of a more spiritual nature and leave this one to focus mainly on health. Let me know what you think…

What’s your “new normal?” (please feel free to leave comments)

Chemo Round 5 – Week 2 Shalom Shattered

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IMG_0959 copyI’m back in the chemo regime after recovering from the fever. Being off of it for two weeks, I’m a little more aware of side-effects which includes shakiness. At the same time, I’m grateful that I can continue with daily activities. In fact, I was able to go on a short cruise last weekend with two of my daughters, an opportunity to make memories together. It was delightful.

One of my weekly activities is a group that meets on Fridays based on the book, To Be Told, by Dan Allender. It’s an encouragement to write our “stories” and to read them to the group each week. It’s as if God is writing a story through us and we listen to what he is saying.

This week we wrote on “Shalom Shattered.” There are times of relative peace in our lives when something abruptly shatters that peace. There were several things I thought about writing on, but the obvious one seemed to be cancer. But as I was writing, I realized cancer didn’t “shatter” my life in the way we usually think. Instead, “I remembered a day in our house in the mountains in Crestline, CA, when a tempered glass door shattered. There was the “boom” of glass exploding, but all the glass stayed in the frame, with spider webs of brokenness running through it. It was frightening, and yet, beautiful as the light filtered through the brokenness. I feel as if I have lived life through the brokenness of the fear of cancer, and then cancer, in a similar way. Instead of focusing on the tragedy that will in some way, in all of us, enter our lives, I’ve taken a step back to look at it in it’s beauty.”

We all have had things that have shattered our peace, or our hope of peace. Sometimes it is a mess of glass on the floor that cuts us and leaves us bleeding, and for those for which it is true, my heart goes out to you. But sometimes, I think I have made things worse, taking glass and cutting myself rather than stepping back into peace. Whatever has shattered your peace, I challenge you to embrace it as you choose your response.

If you are interested in reading my story of “Shalom Shattered”, let me know in the comments and I’ll be glad to email it to you. What has shattered your “Shalom?”